I love missionaries. Honestly, they are some of my favorite people on the planet. My uncle started an orphanage in Kenya that is giving a home to more than 300 kids. Compassion International does some great work and I've recently made friends with some folks in Haiti. Like I said, I love missionaries. That's why in addition to helping you write short mission trip fundraising letters, I thought it would be good to help you set up the perfect fundraising family photo.Have you ever received one of these in the mail? I have. Dozens in fact, but most of them make the same mistakes. There are a few very easy things you can do to dramatically increase the money you are able to raise for your missions. What are those things Jon? I'm glad you asked.
Today, I've posted a two part look at the missionary family photo. This post is the before, using a photo my family sent out in 1977 or so. My father worked for InterVarsity, and although he didn't travel overseas, he was in essence raising ministry dollars. So let's look at what my family did incorrectly:
1. Where is the machete?
I wish this wasn't true, but people like sponsoring exotic missionaries. We like the idea of you swinging through the jungles or crossing the desert to reach a far off people group that needs to hear about the Lord. My dad kind of looks like he is being sent to minister to Ohio in this photo. (No offense Ohio, I heart you.) In addition to not having a machete visible, he's wearing a tie. Ties traditionally cause you to get a 17% smaller donation. I made that number up, but it feels right.
2. Always rock a "missionary mustache"
I have been very honest about my feelings when it comes to facial hair and Christians. I think all male Christian counselors should have "wisdom beards" and all missionaries should have "missionary mustaches." But here, in this photo, my dad is not mustachioed. He instantly loses 23% of the funds he could have gotten had he grown a mustache.
3. No lottery face
I love missionaries that are happy in their photos. I mean they are doing the work of God, are living life where they were called to be, but my mom looks too happy in this photo. She has "lottery face" like someone just told her she won 10 million dollars. In the after photo, featured in part 2 of this post, you'll see how she was able to dial it down using my advice. (I realize I was only 2 at the time but I was very insightful and was able to give them advice on how to improve the photo despite the fact that I was still wearing a diaper.)
4. Mo' kids, Mo' moneyNow that we have two kids, my wife and I giggle that we ever thought one kid was a lot of work. One kid is like a dream compared to two kids. You each have to watch one of them when you have two. You can't play zone defense anymore. It's all man to man now. Two kids is just harder. That's why it's good to always have at least three kids in your mission fundraising photo. If you've only got one, then borrow someone's kids for a few minutes and add them to the photo. (That only feels unethical because it is.)
Those are my four tips, but before we move to the after, I want to point out something. Look how solemn I am. Seriously, look at my little face. It's pensive, quiet and downright missional. I knew at that moment that I had to rock my serious face and not my cute playful face. If I had gone cute, then people that saw the photo would have said, "Awww how cute, that baby doesn't need our money." So instead I went hardcore serious, and people said, "Look at that stoic baby. He's like the CS Lewis of toddlers. Let's support the mission he is on."
But if you think that's a nice move, just wait until you see the photo my family took a few years later.
Read part 2.
Nice stuff! Sort of kind of (not really) makes me wish that Southern Baptist missionaries like my folks had had to heart some of these tips to raise support.
ReplyDeleteAny thought about the guayabera (Latin button-down with all the stitching that you don't tuck in) shirts on the husband or obvious Goodwill hand-me-downs on the kid litter? Those seem like good touches too.
What I think is funny is those slick full color prayer cards with the formal "we paid someone to take this" picture, and paid $10,000 to print 30,000 of these to spread like rain as we take a fundraising vacation (aka Furlough)across North America... They can afford that, but need our funds so they can go back... so they can come back next summer to get a new picture, new card, and a new tour...
ReplyDeleteI would love to support the missionary who is so into their work that they are not planning their next "furlough" before they even leave to go back to "the work"...
Everyone needs time off... but six months every year is a bit excessive isn't it?
Well of course your mom has the lottery face. She's anticipating side hugs, pop and lock, unibrow, and all things sucktacular. If I were her I'd be happy too. The most I can hope for from my son at this point is that he'll stop blowing his nose on his screen-print metro 4-year old shirts. I'm sure your mother is very proud.
ReplyDeleteMoving from 1 kid to 2 is a change, but I chuckle at your thinking 2 kids is tough. At least you have the luxury of playing man to man D. It's when you move from 2 to 3 (or more) and they have you outnumbered, that you are no longer ABLE to play man to man and are forced to play zone, that things get really interesting.
ReplyDeleteI try not to be one of those commenters who feels the need to start some big debate, but, well, here I go. I just have a different perspective than Iisanidiot, I suppose. I'm not a missionary. My parents weren't missionary. But, I'm currently working with several missionaries on various projects. I've actually had conversations with a few of them lately that dread furlough because it's no vacation at all. Even though for many, it is the one time of year they get to visit family and friends, they usually do not get to enjoy it because all of their free time is spent working to raise support so that they can continue their missionary work. Not all missionaries have to raise their own financial support, but I really admire those committed folks who follow God's call despite the stress of having to raise support. (Mostly b/c the thought of God asking ME to do something like that absolutely terrifies me!)
ReplyDeleteI would have to go along with Andrea. My wife and I are Missionaries with New Tribes Mission. We have been raising our support for a year now. And the whole Idea that Missionaries get a "fundraising Vacation". Wow. I would have to disagree completely. We ABSOLUTELY love to share our Ministry with people. But asking for money is, in Stacey from Louisvilles words, 'sucktackluar'! (With No disrespect) If we had more people supporting us, We would be able to go do our ministry which we LONG to begin! (We only get 3 mo for every year, and only come home every 4 years for 1 year.) We are all on the Same team, and Im not in anyway arguing.
ReplyDeleteMissions is Not a Sacrifice, Its a Honor!
Until every tongue, tribe and Nation are reached!
Jim Abbott
Oh and good stuff I need to shave the goat and go for the 'stache'!
ReplyDeleteJim
Wow. You really, really look like your dad, yo.
ReplyDeleteHere's my response to iisanidiot. It started as a comment, and inflated itself into a full blog post, because I didn't want to be the guy that writes responses longer than the original post.
ReplyDeletehttp://benandjacq.tumblr.com/post/41331102/an-honest-reply
You don't know how many times I have explained "zone defense parenting" to our childless friends. Whoever is closer to the child is now responsible for making sure they aren't going to kill themselves. This is especially effective Sunday mornings after church, after the nursery workers finally kick our 2 yr. old out. Really, it's parenting 101 I think.
ReplyDeleteLOL - I love the way you start out by establishing your credibility and how some of your best friends are missionaries and all. :-)
ReplyDeleteI was going to respond to the commenter who thinks missionaries have a little vacation six months out of the year, wasting precious money on frivolous professionally produced prayer cards while children starve and heathen perish, but I see others have done that already, so I will just say...
Dude, SHORTS in a prayer card picture? I think not.
(I spent too much of my childhood sitting for this kind of photo - some of my best friends and family members are missionaries too - and I thought this post and the other one on the same topic were hilarious.)
Funny!! This one and the other one too. One of my favorite all time SCL posts!!
ReplyDeletere iisanidiot: (boy, you're asking for trouble with a name like that!) But I don't comment to give you trouble. Just wanted to say that I remember, growing up, when our pastor would say things like, "The Smith family is coming home on furlough this month. Be sure to go through your closets and find the very best good-as-new clothes you can find for them." I didn't think anything of it, as a child, but now I think, what a travesty!
ReplyDeleteWhy should those who have taken faith and courage in hand, uprooted their family, gone off to a strange culture in a strange land, are more dependent on God than most of us back home will ever be, and stand on the frontlines of a spiritual battle that we are not likely to EVER understand, fight the enemy and contend for the faith among a people who are so hard to reach, -- why should they not deserve the VERY best that we can offer them. Here is a recent quote from a missionary on furlough that I coincidently received just today --"publicly" thanking some individuals who helped them in so many ways while they were home:
- Providing a vehicle for us to rent
- Storing our belongings for the last 3 years and continuing
- Giving ministry advice, particularly in the area of Christian Education
- Caring for our 2 little ones when we attended conference and other busy days
- Storing and delivering some of our luggage
- Providing winter clothing for our little ones
- Preparing our taxes
- Taking care of our mail
- Providing transportation for 2 of our children
- Computer advice and technical support
- Providing us free internet access
- Providing beds and meals during our many travels
- Loaning a roof carrier, a bike rack and a utility trailer for our use (3 different individuals!)
- Giving free mechanical help for our vehicle
- Providing a beautiful get-away location for our use for a week
- Encouragement and Prayer & so much more!
Nice pointers.
ReplyDeleteWe've always said that it was man to man defense until we had three kids. Then it switched to zone.
Oh, shucks. Anon beat me to it but you totally do look like your dad. :)
ReplyDeleteNow we just need the church photo directory post. You must have something hilarious to say about that. One of my friends still has some directories from the early '80's. Prime blackmail material, that. My husband managed to avoid having our family photo taken so successfully at church that a deacon finally showed up at our house one night with a camera. I haven't seen the result yet, but I am afraid. I'm sure one of my kids is probably making a goofy face.
ReplyDeleteWhoa,whoa- flag on the play! I'm an ER nurse IN OHIO. I can attest that we have machetes....and what about the Cincinnati Bengals' theme...."Welcome to the Jungle"? You can get pretty exotic here in Ohio! I'm headed for a mission trip to Haiti and I feel my cornfields have adequately prepared me. I say -beating my chest and my baseball hat cocked to the side- "Bring it!" I don't sport a mustache though....oh wait....girls aren't supposed to? If I sport a mustache as a girl do I get more money?
ReplyDeleteFirst off I would like to say sorry to anyone that I offended, and also sorry that my post was longer than the blog post.
ReplyDeleteIn defense of the missionary and the prayer cards, North American expectations of slick full color prayer cards has placed the obligation on the missionary to provide them, rather than something "lesser".
I happen to live in an area that has a few missionary guest apartments, so, perhaps I see more missionaries at my church in the run of a year than other churches. And seemingly I see a lot of the same missionaries...
From my perspective I just keep wondering how necessary these families are on the missionfield from the amount of time they can be away from their work...
I also want to say that I believe that missions is a vital part of the overall Christian work... and I also want to say that North American Christians need to figure out a way to support the missionaries so they don't need the slick cards and six months a year to raise funds.
Again... sorry if I upset anyone...
CS Lewis of toddlers... hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI just recently got internship at Compassion International. I think their work couldn't really be conceived of as "mission work." They are a child advocacy organization whose goal is the holistic development of a child in poverty. I mean, they do share the gospel with the children in the program, but never in a way where if they don't receive Christ they are "kicked out." I guess they do need to raise support for the 1 million children they have in their programs, but they never use the poverty the children are in as a catch to "guilt" people into sponsoring a child. The pictures taken for the sponsorship packets are taken with the thought, "Would the mother be proud of this picture?". They don't stoop low and exploit the children in the "pornography of poverty." Anyways, I don't have any problems with the post, just thought I'd throw that out there. Love the site and the daily devotional thoughts on 97secondswitgod. They really help my walk a lot. Take care, Jon!!
ReplyDeleteAh!!! InterVarsity!!!
ReplyDeleteI love IV, it's my favorite thing about life right now!
:D
Yhtomit...I work at Compassion too. Welcome aboard! I have to disagree with you though. It sounds like you are equating "missions" with "raising support"? I think that what we do in "releasing children from poverty in Jesus' name" is the very definition of missions! More than 100,000 children made first time professions of faith just last year! Wow! And that was not only because they heard the Gospel, but because their bellies were full, they were healthy, they were at school rather than sifting through trash at the dump...all of the "holistic" things that we do enable these kids and their families to see Jesus, not just hear about him. They also see Jesus in loving sponsors who believe in them and pray for them from half way around the world. Not only that, but we are enabling and equipping the local church to be more effective in its ministry to these families. Not exactly church planting, but its definitely missional. :-)
ReplyDelete(What you say about the pictures of the kids, though, is absolutely spot on. :-) )
OH MY GOODNESS this is hilarious. As former MK I forwarded it onto every MK I know. We all dreaded furlough (the singing and dancing portion of my parents job) and taking these ridiculous photos. Our mission wanted us to dress in "native attire" one year to earn 15% more money (yes I made that up too). My favorite was that when I graduated from high school rather than taking a new photo without me they actually had volunteers cut me out of the photo for display and mailing purposes. So for my parents you received a prayer card with a hole where my head once was. I hope people spent time praying for the missing child in my parents family.
ReplyDelete@Jules, good point. I think it just depends on the way you think about missions work. I think of missions work as a missionary going overseas... but, you are right, they share the Gospel with those kids often. I see it as more the people in those countries working for the projects are witnessing to those kids, in my mind not so much missionary work. But, hey, I'm not gonna say there's only one way to look at it. You definitely have it right too. Compassion is such a great place, I hope more people come to know about it.
ReplyDeleteZone defense... Man 2 Man... I know a family with 3 kids. The 3rd kid is a hand full. So they are required to run a box and one on her. For you non-basketball players, the mom plays zone while the dad plays man 2 man on the bad kid... :-)
ReplyDeleteHow about graying hair and a pony tail for counselors who can't grow "wisdom beards"? And maybe a cool tattoo?
ReplyDeleteI think our slick cards cost us $99 for 10,000. I was thinking I was giving folks an opportunity to give toward the expansion of the kingdom. Now I know better how to manipulate their wallets. Seriously funny post though. Especially part two-massive improvement, especially Donald duck.
ReplyDeleteI love your stuff! Anyway, you need to rethink your theory on basketball defenses and number of children. One kid is not a zone defense. It is a double-team. However you are correct that two kids are requires a man-to-man defense. We have four kids, all born in four years. Now that is a real zone defense! I long for the old days when we had the option of playing man-to-man or zone!
ReplyDeleteI loved that your dad worked for InterVarsity, it's the college group that I am apart of. Also, the whole time I read these 2 blogs I was thinking of the photo I have of our IV leader's family- they are uprooting there lives from South Dakota to go do missions in Belgium. The photo does look nicely done, but he is also sporting a goatee and has his wife and 3 adorable children with him. I think cuteness of children is also a good money maker...
ReplyDelete